Being Strung Along While I realize this site is dedicated to intimate relationships. I think it is important for this column to point out that being strung along happens not only in our intimate relationships but also in friendships and families. All are equally destructive, disrespectful and painful. Also, to clarify what it means to be strung along, for my purposes it is when ... View Post
Being Single
Being Single One of the dysfunctions of today’s society is the continuous quest to be in a relationship. The philosophy that we are not complete, or validated, until we are mated is really co-dependent neediness in disguise. Common language used to hide the neediness is “I just want someone to share my life with”, or “I don’t need a partner I just like having some one around to do ... View Post
Saying No
How To Say “No” Without Hurting Feelings or Feeling Guilty The word “no” is interesting! It is just two little letters that we have assigned such importance. If you have a hard time saying no without feeling bad then there are two things going on that represent poor boundaries. One is taking responsibility for others emotions and the other is being a people ... View Post
Resilience
Being Resilient Being resilient in a crisis happens best by taking good care of ourselves on a daily basis. Think of it this way, when we are balanced we are our most resilient. But does that mean if you are not balanced there is no hope? No, it just makes it a bit harder. To achieve or maintain resilience it is important to have some daily rituals for ... View Post
How To Heal a Broken Heart
Grieve as long as it takes There are many times that people stay in unhealthy relationships simply for the fact that they don’t want them to end, when they end the grieving process begins! In our culture we are told we are not doing it right if we grieve. We are told that if we grieve we are “breaking down”, being “weak”, “wearing our heart on our sleeve”, etc. And in this process of judgment ... View Post
I Always Have a Fear of Abandonment and I Am Not Sure How To Overcome This Problem and Have a Safe, Healthy Relationship
Q. When i first start dating a guy, I feel overwhelmed. All day, every day, I find that I am completely distracted with thoughts of him. I can’t concentrate on my work and I find myself hoping that he will call or text me during the day. I’m happy when he does but feel disappointed when he doesn’t. I’m almost 40 years old and yet I feel that I behave like a teenager (inside at least) when it ... View Post